How it Works
The reality is that politics exists everywhere — in families, at school, in communities, churches, poker groups, knitting groups, the kids’ softball team, your softball team, the neighborhood block party, the play group at the park — everywhere. Politics feels ugly and overwhelming at work because the stakes are high: your career and your livelihood depend on it, so you can’t walk away from people you dislike or whose values don’t mesh with yours.
People don’t fail in their careers because they don’t have technical knowledge or skills. They fail in their careers because they don’t have the interpersonal, political skills they need to interact effectively with peers, managers, and employees.
To succeed in the corporate world while keeping your values and integrity untarnished, you need three things.
- Get curious about the possibility that politics can be productive, honorable, and even (whisper it!) fun. When you open the door to a new definition of corporate politics, you open the door to new ways of thinking, behaving, and talking. And when there are new possibilities, the previously impossible is suddenly within reach.
- Walk a mile in their shoes. When you understand why others — even the manipulative backstabbers — do what they do, you know how to adjust your approach to them and get things done. It doesn’t require becoming who they are, adopting their mindset, or even agreeing with them. It just means temporarily changing your shoes (a.k.a. your viewpoint) — and consciously experiencing a little empathy.
- Learn the language of authentic, powerful, safe communication. No, this isn’t another communication training program, nor am I your high school English teacher coming back to haunt you! But word choice, word sequence, and tone have tremendous power and subtlety. There are many ways to convey the same factual message; some ways are hurtful and manipulative, and others are empathetic and heartfelt.
Hmm. She keeps talking about “empathy” and now she said “heartfelt.” What is this? How can you bring empathy, heart, or compassion into the cutthroat world of corporate politics?
Being empathetic doesn’t mean becoming a doormat for everyone to wipe their feet on.
It does mean that you take the time and effort to step out from behind your own viewpoint and goals, just for a moment, to see what’s going on for someone else. When you do that, you have what you need to act from your heart.
Acting from your heart doesn’t mean bleeding your emotions all over the conference room table.
But with your new understanding of what’s up for the others involved, you can choose your words and actions to help them feel safe and show your compassion for their situation.
Being compassionate doesn’t mean you’re suddenly the office psychologist.
Instead, compassion creates safety, and safety is disarming. Now they’re less defensive and more ready to hear you and understand what you want and need.
And suddenly you’re getting things done.
Politics is the science and art of human interaction
You have a choice — you can wage political war, or you can heal relationships between conflicting points of view and actually get something accomplished. You can say the easy, empty, expedient words, or you can empathize, understand, meet people halfway and not only get something accomplished, but sleep well at night. And have the career you want.
If this makes sense to you, start out with my free workbook “The Five Deadly Shoulds of Office Politics that Maul, Mangle, and Murder Careers (and what to do about them).” It’s full of straighforward concepts, real-life examples, and practical techniques to help you start shifting your approach to office politics. You’ll also receive my twice-monthly newsletter with additional practical advice.
If you’re still not sure, you may be stuck in a fundamental misconception. What is it? Click here to find out.