One of the participants in the networking class I conducted recently asked some terrific questions about online networking. 

I don’t pretend to be an expert in online networking.  I certainly am active online, but I’m still learning the ropes and figuring it all out.  My class, which I’m delighted to say got rave reviews, focuses primarily on the dreaded in-person networking – and how to feel a lot less dread about it!

Nonetheless, I think online networking is an important part of most people’s networking arsenal, and for many it can provide a lot of value.  So my class does include an overview of it – what it is, some places and ways to get started, and so on. 

However, every now and then I come across a blog post that basically rants about how no one needs to network in person, because they can do it all online.  

Maybe, but for most of us, not.

I recognize, acknowledge, and sympathize with the desire to stay at home and connect with others through your written words on the Internet.  It’s simpler and a whole lot less scary than having to figure out which event to attend, dress appropriately, get in the car, drive, park, and actually meet total strangers face-to-face. 

If your objectives for networking can be completely met online, by all means, go for it. 

But not everyone hangs out online, and if you’re looking for people who aren’t there – guess what?  You end up like the man in the old joke, hunting for his keys under the street light even though he dropped them over in the dark alley.  Sure, there may be more light there (you may feel more comfortable and at ease online), but he’s not going to find his keys – and you’re not going to find people who aren’t there.

There’s only one hard and fast rule in this life, and it’s not about networking, online or otherwise.  It’s simply that no single solution works for every single person. 

You may find that online networking makes you feel better than face-to-face networking, and also brings you all the results you want and hope for.  Terrific. 

Most people need and want (despite their feelings of dread and uncertainty) a combination of online and face-to-face.

And for some people – like some of my clients who are completely (and legitimately) uninterested – online networking simply isn’t relevant for their needs right now. 

Never say never.  Even if you don’t see any point in face-to-face when you can Tweet, join LinkedIn and Facebook groups, hang out in online forums, or however you like to network on the Internet, don’t assume that everyone can achieve the same success that you have – even if they want to. 

This was an Ask Grace post, in which I answer readers’ questions. Got a question? Send it to me or write a comment.

If you’re interested in learning more about the networking class – it’s not currently scheduled, and you can read more about it by following this link.   If you send me an email – either through my contact page or through the link on the networking class site – I will be sure to inform you when I schedule the class again, as well as letting you know when the home-study version of the program is released, sometime in the next four or five weeks.  Or just leave me a comment here, and I’ll get back to you.

Good question. 

Like most feelings, vulnerability is relative.  As a new blogger, I’m still bumbling around trying to find my “blogging voice,” trying to feel my way into understanding how it’s different from my article-writing voice. 

And I’m bumbling around inside myself trying to figure out how to listen to my fear about all of this and still show up the way I want to, as myself, just me, smiles and warts and joy and vulnerability and all.  (Uh, just for the record, I actually don’t have warts right now.)

I was reminded of a quote from Dr. Seuss: “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”  (With thanks to Adam Kayce of Monk at Work, who Twittered it yesterday.)

My fear, however, isn’t very impressed by motivational quotes.

There’s another quote, an old children’s rhyme:  “When in danger or in doubt, Run in circles, scream and shout.”  I think my fear likes that one better.

I’ve gotten very friendly with my fear over my years of being self-employed.  I’ve learned that trying to ignore it or tell it to go away doesn’t work.  As I said in the post “Fear: the other ‘f’ word,” fear ignored just gets louder and louder.  In fact, when you ignore it really well (as one of my clients is currently discovering), it goes underground and tunnels around down there where you can’t see it.  (That’s when you find yourself doing weird things that undercut all your efforts towards what you really want. )

2009 is apparently the year in which I make a lot of changes a lot more changes in my business.  Most of those All those changes involve me showing up in new and bigger and MUCH more vulnerable ways. 

So here I am to tell you that I’m both wildly excited, and scared stiff.  And “scared stiff” isn’t just a catchy slang phrase, either.  Sometimes what I’m planning to do scares me into complete immobility, and then for a while absolutely nothing gets done. 

But I’ve learned something about fear over these years of being self-employed.  My fear is trying to protect me from what it considers to be unacceptable risks.  I know that now.  I also know that its definition of “unacceptable risk” isn’t the same as mine, weird as that may sound. 

I’m going ahead with the big changes.  You’ll see them in upcoming weeks as I roll out a new website design, including all-new descriptions of what it is I really do. 

Because after discovering that corporate politics is just as taboo as sex, I also discovered that although I’ve definitely got a talent for figuring out political tangles, it’s also far from the only, or the most important, thing that I help my clients with.

More on that later.  In the meantime, here’s me where I am: frightened half silly by what I’m doing, and at the same time completely delighted and humbled by the amazing opportunity for me to show up and really do the work I’m here to do.

Feel free to join in and help keep me honest.

This was an Ask Grace post, in which I answer readers’ questions. Got a question? Send it to me or write a comment.

Many years ago, I read a book by Charles de Lint called Svaha.  At the time, I was still deep in my corporate career.  But I loved the book (I enjoy all of de Lint’s work) and the word, and I knew I’d use it for something important someday.

When I came to start my business, it was a no-brainer.  There are times – such as when I’m trying to give someone my email address over the phone – when I wish I’d engaged a few more brain cells.  On the other hand, people do tend to remember it, especially when I tell them what it means.

So what does it mean?

According to de Lint, it’s a Native American word for the time between seeing lightning and hearing the thunder. 

Unfortunately, as Matt Baya (who hosts websites at svaha.com) discovered in his research, even de Lint isn’t sure what Native American tribe it comes from.  (De Lint’s response was that he’d thrown out his notes, which baffles me, but there you are.)

I cling to the word and the meaning with determination, however, because of its sense of wide-open horizons.  In that moment when your eyes are still dazzled by the flash, you hold your breath.  Anything can happen.  You don’t know what will happen.  It feels slightly dangerous and exciting.  The possibilities are suddenly endless.

In a beautiful, five-letter nutshell, Svaha represents so much of what I bring to my clients: 

• Power of not knowing
• Beauty of curiosity
• Boundless potential
• Risk, excitement, exploration

So that’s Svaha.

Just for fun, it also has several other very cool meanings:

In Russian, it means matchmaker.

It’s a minor Hindu fire goddess.

And in some practices, it’s used to close a meditation.

What more could I ask?

An Ask Grace post, in which I answer readers’ questions. Got a question? Send it to me or write a comment.