Svaha: the time between seeing lightning and hearing the thunder
I will be eternally grateful for your great gift of taking in to the fullest extent what it is that I have to offer, living it, and then reflecting it back in terms of the potential experience of others. You have given words to a process that defies words. And you’re constantly in a position to help me continue to hone that, deeper and deeper and more and more resonantly, who I am and what I offer, which is truly invaluable. — Jon Hansen, The Remembering Room, Richmond, Illinois
What you’ve sent me is so darn perfect it hurts! It’s a sheer pleasure to work with someone who writes as beautifully as you do — and in “my” voice. — Ariane Goodwin, Ed.D, smARTist® Telesummit, Millers Falls, Massachusetts
You have a real gift for words. You’re really, really good at it. — Sherry Essig, Priority Ventures Group, Raleigh, North Carolina
You’ve built such integrity of message in your company. I know that’s because it springs forth intrinsically, but you stay so focused at your core! I can’t think of a better way to phrase that laser-beam focus you have. It’s funny, because in someone else, laser-beam focus would be intense, but somehow you manage to make it much more kind and easy. — Jessica Albon, Thrive Your Tribe, Winston-Salem, North Carolina
I’ve never worked with anybody in the way that I’ve worked with you in terms of trusting in your abilities to the level that I have. — Catherine Hajnal PhD, Eight Branches Consulting, Vancouver, Canada ... facilitating and nurturing joyful living
You have an uncanny ability to see through what is being said and surface all the “unsaid” issues. Then you quickly give candid feedback and have a tremendous toolbox to help me move forward through your expert guidance of the right tool.
I have worked with many facilitators/coaches/counselors relating to work and personal situations. Your skills are exemplary and moved me faster than I ever expected. — Jennifer Baker, Fishers, Indiana
You bring both a spiritual perspective and some real-world hard-headedness. — Janet Bailey, Mindful Time Management, San Francisco, California
Brava! I wish I could draw a picture of me — you’d see me in a deep bow to you!
I read your newsletter as soon as it hits my in-box and you’re always right on with your advice. I had to let you know that this issue is particularly brilliant.
I will definitely keep this info — and your contact info — in a secure place.
Thanks so much for sharing your insight and wisdom. — Debbie Rodgers, CGA
February 2, 2010
Legend has it that when Christopher Columbus and his crew landed on the shores of what would become the United States, the natives saw them walking up out of the water, miraculously appearing across the waves.
They had no concept of “ship,” and so quite literally could not see the ships Columbus sailed on.
I don’t know if it’s true or not. I do know that the human mind has the ability to hold amazing blind spots.
A few summers ago, some guests and I adjourned to my hot tub after dinner. I turned the pump on to drive the jets.
One guest asked if I could leave them off. She preferred not to be pummelled, I think — and it would be quieter so we could talk.
Now, I’m far from stupid. But it wasn’t until I saw everyone looking at me funny that I realized that turning off each individual jet wasn’t the answer. Turning off the pump was not only simpler, but far more effective!
Whether you’re marketing yourself in your business or to an employer, or whether you’re problem-solving within the context of your job or for your personal life — I’ll guarantee that you’ve got similar blind spots.
There’s something you’re not seeing.
Something that’s obvious to others.
A different perspective would bring new ideas, simpler solutions, and greater creativity and inspiration. But your perspective is how you look at the situation. Trying to see it differently without help is almost impossible.
Here are a few things to bear in mind when you ask for that help.
It may seem strange to say don’t ask experts. After all, the experts are the people who know, right?
Maybe. But I’ll bet you’ve already been learning from the experts. You’ve already read their blogs and books, signed up for their classes, sought out their advice and mentorship.
Find someone who has no clue about what you’re doing, and ask her. Sometimes the most obvious things are the hardest for experts to see — yet are plain as day to the beginner.
Several years ago, I wrote an article in this newsletter called Talking to Teddy Bears. It describes that strange thing that happens when you bring a problem out of your head and explain it to someone else.
As you explain your situation to someone who’s not an expert, you’re forced to adopt his beginner’s perspective. And that helps you see what you’ve been missing.
Often, what was obscure becomes obvious, and the solution smacks you between the eyes. (In a good way!)
Sometimes it feels like you can’t ask.
Maybe there’s no one you think you can trust. Perhaps you just feel too painfully vulnerable. For whatever reason, you don’t feel as if there’s anyone you can ask for help.
As I’ve said, when you can’t get help, it’s much harder to see what you’re missing. But it is still possible.
Get wacky with it. Take out paper and pen, and write — quickly and without judging — six things that your cat would do in this situation. (If you’re not a cat person, write as a two-year-old child.)
You won’t necessarily have really workable ideas — but you will find that you’ve taken the lid off the box and let your creativity out to play. And more often than you might expect, you’ll find the seed of something that, given a little time to grow, could be just the answer you’re looking for.
And oh, yes — don’t forget to explain the problem to your teddy bear. Or your cat, dog, or two-year-old.
Because as I said, letting the problem out of your head is often all you need to do.
“The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them.” Attributed to Albert Einstein, 1879-1955, American theoretical physicist (and if you ask me, a philosopher)
“I’m looking over a four-leaf clover, That I overlooked before...” From the song of the same name written in 1927 by Mort Dixon, 1892 - 1956, American lyricist.
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